Charcoal Drawings: White Rose and Feeling Trapped

Charcoal Drawing, "White Rose" 8"x10"

I took a sick day about a month ago. It was snowing, and I was feeling really conflicted. I felt like after a few frustrating events in my life, that I needed a minute to reconnect what I loved doing and feel some reassurance. I started first with the image below, which I had been thinking about for a while and finally just did it (maybe I'll do a series - I do think it's a cool concept).

Do you ever look around and just feel trapped? Maybe a huge doctor's bill put grocery shopping off another few weeks, or that car you pictured owning after graduation took a side seat because of the constant battle between your rent, student loans, and current paycheck. I guess this feeling of entrapment stems a bit from money - like all the possibilities before and during college are no longer possible because my sole mission now is to make money in order to pay off that education and to support myself. That art career won't pay for it: at least not now. And definitely no vacations for a while - at least last year I had my best friend's wedding in Florida as a fabulous excuse. So I'm stuck.

"Trapped", Charcoal 11"x16" on white paper

I needed reassurance and I needed it fast. After a frustrated attempt at painting two months ago, I busted out what I could find for charcoal supplies (and amazed how little I had - in school and before I always had a "kit" of essentials nearby), Googled an image of hands on jail bars, and started sketching. The simplicity, ease of blending, and quick buildup of charcoal made me feel better immediately. I felt like I really captured what I was feeling on paper, and felt so satisfied once it was completed.

After that weight had been lifted, I didn't want to stop. I wanted something that would last longer, that would be a challenge: so, with the same paper but cut down to an unused matted frame size, I Googled images of White Roses. Do you have ANY idea how difficult it is to sketch out, let alone DRAW a rose?? There's each petal, that has to make sense with the petals surrounding it, then each of those petals has to have the right shading for the whole image to make sense. But I sat there, with Grey's Anatomy in the background in my studio, and sketched lightly, then re-sketched, then finally filling in the darks. When that image was finally complete (see above) I felt immensely satisfied.

Sometimes it's not about where you are in your life when you look around - and sometimes there's only so much you can do. What I do know, is doing what you're good at once in a while (think riding-a-bike-skill) can really make you smile. And we all need that to keep going.

Commission Drawing for Birthday

Remember my charcoal drawing I did of Papa and I last month? Well, after seeing it at my graduation party, (mom framed it. And I think stole it.) a family friend commissioned me to do a drawing of her two daughters for their father's birthday. I've known the girls forever, so I have to admit I was a bit nervous drawing them - would I be able to capture who they were? Could I make the drawing actually look like them? The last drawing was for fun: this one meant business.


I loved how this came out. Better yet, I loved having an excuse to draw again: I haven't too much since I graduated: and even then, my last semester of art school I didn't take any drawing classes. I also LOVE drawing people!

So here is the original picture (it's very hard taking a photograph of a photograph, P.S.) Do you think I got close? On the day I started working on this, I lost power in my apartment. At 4:00 pm. So it was fine, as I had window light. Then it got dark. I tried the ye-olde drawing thing with a candle, but that didn't last long. But I'm sure it would have been funny to watch if I wasn't so pissed about it that I had to stop what I was doing.

Anyway, this really is a cool, unique gift idea, and I've been doing drawings like this (commissioned and for fun) for years. If you're interested to find out more or to talk about pricing, email me!

Oh yeah - and for those who roll their eyes at those who go to "art school", I seem to be doing a damn good job now that I'm out. And I had a delicious breakfast this morning: not even starving at all...;)

Charcoal Drawing

I'll admit it - this has been a tough week for me. I feel stuck for some reason, and I know it's the restless artist in me that is not being creative or challenged enough. I have to admit also that I was freaking out after going to art school and then getting a job that I go to every day that couldn't be farther from art. So I went to Blick on my day off yesterday to buy a pack of charcoal pencils.

I needed to draw. I thought I'd go through some old pictures I took in Italy and make a sketch of something. But after several years of figure drawing and portraiture, I needed to draw a face. And who better than my grandfather, who passed away last September.

I have a couple photos of him that I keep in my shelf along with one of his hats. I saw it and knew I had to draw it. I'm about 2 years old in this picture on Papa's lap, him pointing at the camera for me to look at and smile at the bottom. I have to admit I was a little scared as well - what if after all this time I couldn't do the one thing that I loved so much in this world? What if I couldn't give Papa what it was that made him so special?

You can check out the photo and the drawing and see for yourself. I am so happy with the way it came out - and I have to say, it really was like riding a bike. After the first few lines of suggesting the forms, I got right back into it. I sketched out all of the forms, became obsessed with the shadows. This is what I had gone to school for. This is what I had taken loans against to develop: there's no question in my mind at all that I truly followed my passion. Now I just have to reconcile it with my everyday - if that means squeezing in drawing between my calligraphy jobs, work, and the gym, so be it.

I guess that's all we can really do in life: find what it is that makes us happy, then follow through.